No, I Don’t Have a Side Hustle
Don’t ask me what I’m doing now that my kids are back at school. I’m breathing. I’m staring at a wall. I’m figuring my sh*t out. Do I want a job? No. I don’t. The last time I had one I was bored as hell. I sat at a computer all day and had lower back pain. I spent most afternoons anxiously looking at the clock to see when I could escape office life purgatory. So no, I’m not job hunting.
What about a side hustle? Nah. F*ck that. I’m not going to be selling leggings, children’s books or scraps of cloth that can magically clean your house without the use of chemicals. I’m going to be doing me and taking care of myself during these three to four hour chunks of “free time” I have daily. I do not want to spend my time “hustling” just so that I can feel burned out and like a failure when whatever crap I’m hawking doesn’t sell because I don’t know how to use hashtags. #blessed #privileged #biteme
I’m going to be working on healing my heart and soul in the wake of the sh*t show of collective trauma we all just experienced. How can I afford to just chill? That’s easy: privilege. Long ago, my husband sold his soul to the corporate devil, and thus, I do not have to worry about earning money. What if he leaves me for someone younger? He wouldn’t dare, but if he did, there’s always botox and alimony baby.
Do I feel like I can’t spend money on myself since he’s the one earning the paycheck? Hahahahahah. NO. We are partners. His name might be on the pay slip, but you better believe my name is on the account where the direct deposit goes. When he works long hours, I work long hours. He is able to work sixteen hour days because. of. me. He can focus on his boring ass job and be praised for his commitment to his role (vomit) because I am here keeping all the plates in the air. I have cooked dinner, done the dishes and put the kids to bed flying solo more than enough times to have earned some “me time” while our kids are at school.
Caring for my mental and physical wellness is good for my entire family. When I’ve had time off I have much more energy to cuddle, read a book or throw a ball, and actually be present and have fun while doing so. So what will I do between the hours of 9–1:00 Monday through Friday? None of your goddamn business.
Photo by Garrhet Sampson on Unsplash